Just a quick update, trying to get my strength back. I can't stand up for a long time without sitting down and I can walk a little ways and then have to sit down. It is sure nice to have good friends. My buddy, Ken Symer, gave me a joke the other day and he probably doesn't even know he did, so I would like to tell it.
The owner of a small farm was being investigated for allegedly not paying his workers proper wages. "I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them," demanded the interviewing agent.
"Well," replied the farmer, "there's my farmhand, who has been with me for three years. I pay him $200 a week plus free room and board. The cook has been here for 18 months, and I pay her $150 a week plus free room and board. Then there's the half-wit who works about 18 hours every day and does 90 percent of all the work around here. He makes about $10 a week and pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of borubon every Saturday night. He also sleeps with my wife occasionally."
"That's the guy I want to talk to, the half-wit," said the agent.
The farmer replied. "That would be me."
....
It is obvious that the farmer in this story must love his job. Like most of us out there I seem to be happiest working hard at what I love to do. It's hard doing nothing but baby steps first, getting my strength back, and beating this disease. I'll be back before you know it.
Love you all,
Rod
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Good Morning Dr. Huss,
ReplyDeleteLOL :) Glad your spirits are up a bit. Baby steps are OK. Confucius said, "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step". Take one moment at a time, one step at a time, and one day at a time.
ARE YOU A PROFESSIONAL?
This quiz consists of four questions that tell whether or not you are qualified to be a professional. The answers are below and there is no reason to cheat. The questions are not that difficult. You just need to think like a professional.
1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?
The correct answer is:
Open the refrigerator, put the giraffe in and close the door.
This question tests whether or not you are doing simple things in a complicated manner.
2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?
INCORREST answer:
Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant and shut the refrigerator.
Correct answer:
Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. This question tests your foresight
3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend except one. Which animal does not attend?
Correct answer:
The elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator.
This question tests if you are capable of comprehensive thinking.
OK, if you did not answer the last three questions correctly, this one may be your last chance to test your qualifications to be a professional.
4. There is a river filled with crocodiles. How do you cross it?
Correct answer:
Simply swim across. There cannot be any crocodiles in the river as they are all attending the animal conference. The question tests your reasoning ability.
So... if you answered four out of four correctly, you are a true professional. Wealth and success await you.
If you answered three out of four, you have some catching up to do, but there is hope for you.
If you answered two out of four, consider a career as a hamburger flipper.
If you answered one out of four, try selling some of your organs. It is the only way you will ever make any money.
If you answered none correctly, consider a career that does not require any higher mental function at all, such as law, politics, computer support, or counting votes in Florida.
Hope you hav ea great day.
Hugs,
Janet
I loved that story!! Ha ha ha.
ReplyDeleteDear Dr. Huss,
ReplyDeleteIt makes me happy to hear the strength in your posts. Thank you for keeping us updated and we look forward to seeing you back at the office. Get your rest and take care.
Love,
Rita Washington
Hi Dr. Huss,
ReplyDeleteSorry I missed you this morning. The girls in OB said you are looking good. I am glad you are up and about. I was doing a little reading about laughter and researchers have found that laughter will bring balance to your immune system. When a person laughs, the stress hormones shut off and the T-cells and B-cells are increased. Researchers have also found Gamma-interferon is more abundant. I had to look that up. Gamma-interferon helps fight viral, bacterial and tumor growth. Another benefit is that laughter works your respiratory system, diaphragm, abs, leg, back, and facial muscles. Laughing 100 times is equal to 10-15 minutes of bike riding. I think they mean bicycle and not motorbike. :) Anyway, laughter will help fight disease and improve health.
Here's a joke for you.
The Power of the Badge
DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas, and talks with an old rancher. He tells the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs." The rancher says, "Okay, but do not go in that field over there," as he points out the location.
The DEA officer verbally explodes saying, “Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me." Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removes his badge and proudly displays it to the rancher. "See this badge? This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish on any land. No questions asked or answers given. Have I made myself clear? Do you understand? “
The rancher nods, apologizes, and goes about his chores.
A short time later, the old rancher hears loud screams and sees the DEA officer
running for his life chased by the rancher's big Santa Gertrudis bull......
With every step the bull is gaining ground on the officer, and it seems likely that he'll get gored before the officer reaches safety. The officer is clearly terrified. The rancher throws down his tools, runs to the fence and yells at the top of his lungs.....
“Your badge. Show him your BADGE! "
That's telling him whose boss. TeeHee.
Have a good night.
Hugs, Janet
Hey Bro. I've been trying to get on your blog for a couple of days now and on my computer it just comes up with a blank screen. Thought I'd try it again today and it worked. Glad to see you're home...bummer that the chemo is kickin your butt. Mom hasn't figured out how to get on to your blog yet, so i tell her what is going on. Jenny and Camrom are at her house now, so maybe they can help her get on her computer and find your blog. She will be coming home around April 7. Time sure goes by fast. Glad your spirits are up. I hope you get feeling stronger soon. Take care and we love you.
ReplyDeleteGood morning Dr. Huss, Julie and Madelyn,
ReplyDeleteIt is April fool’s day, so I decided to do some research. I found many references on how the day became famous. Among the many explanations, the story of the Gregorian calendar seems to be the trend. So, it is highly probable that is how it started. So, if you have not heard this story, here is a very quick review.
Sometime in the 1580’s the king wanted to change the New Year from April 1st to January 1st. Not everyone in the kingdom knew this, so many people continued to celebrate the New Year on April 1st. Well, after a period of time the ones celebrating on April 1st were known as the fools and thus the pranks began.
Well, after researching all this history here are a couple of the funniest pranks: an astronomer announced that on April 1, 1976 at 9:47 am the planets would align in such a way to cause a temporary decrease in the Earth’s gravity. This caused many people to see how high they could jump. LOL.
And
Recorded in the Museum of Hoaxes in 1957 Switzerland experienced an early spaghetti harvest.
Hope you all have a great day. Be careful someone does not come up to you and stick a sign on your back. TeeHee.
Hugs,
Janet
Hey Rod, great to hear you're home and doing well. I'll be brief as my last several posts have all failed. If this works I'll say more later. All the best, Dave
ReplyDeleteHi Dr., Julie, & Madelyn,
ReplyDeleteI hope your day was restful. I have a bunch of movies in my library if you need a couple.
When I was visiting my dad he had all his old motocross pictures on a slide show. It was fun to look at them and remember the fun times at the track. It made me think of you. You will be out there taking jumps and riding the hoop-de-dos in no time.
Ok here some medicine.
The Smart Blonde
A blonde woman boards an airplane. She is extremely exhausted and just wants to take a nap. She finally finds her seat and sits down next to a very curious young man.
He wants to test the whole dumb blonde thing and possibly make some money out of it. "Hey, wanna play a game?" he asks her. "No thank you, i just want to take a nap." "Please, its really easy, all you have to do is answer the questions that i ask you and I will answer the questions you ask me. If you don't know the answer, then you give me five dollars, and if I don't know the answer to your question, then Ill give you five dollars."
"I really don't want to do this. I just want to take a nap" she says.
The young man responds, "Oh but PLEASE pretty please. How about if I don't know the answer to your question, I'll give you five hundred dollars."
The blonde woman became interested and decided to play the game.
"Okay. How many moons does jupiter have?" the young man asked. The woman reached into her purse and took out a five dollar bill.
The blonde woman asks, "What goes up the mountain with three legs and comes back down with four?".
The young man, determined not to lose, gets out his laptop and searches all over the internet for an answered. Flustered and confused, the young man hand the blonde five hundred dollars.
After a while, the young man was itching to know the answer to the question so he asks "What was the answer to the riddle?"
The blonde woman reached into her purse and handed the young man a five dollar bill.
Have a great weekend and may the Easter Bunny leave you plenty of Snickers.
:)
Janet